Why don't we have to take a test to be parents

So if you have read Riley's story you will know that she spent 4.5 months in the NICU. The NICU is a very interesting place to be for any period of time. You don't realise that you are holding your breath and how on edge of your seat you are in until you walk out of the NICU. If I never have to hear the beeping and alarming of the monitors in there it will be too soon. Riley is our only child, so one or both of us were at the NICU everyday, most days more than once. We only live 20-30 minutes away. The only days we were not there were during the terrible snow storms of 2009/2010 and even than we tried ad made it on several of days during the worst of it. The other time was when we had to go out of town for a wedding and then we made arrangements to have someone come see her every day. My mother also went most days as well.

Riley was in a hospital that had a very large NICU, it had upwards of 45 babies at a time. In comparsion a friend's son was in the NICU in a differnt state for 6 weeks that only had 10-15 babies. In the room my daugther was in had 12 babies in it. I was amazed at how many of the babies had no vistors at all. I understand that people hjave other children that may keep them away or maybe they lived far away. And we were there alot, but all day everyday. But we made friends with the nurses and know that some of the babies where never visited at all.

Now I am the first person to say that the NICU is a stressful place and I get that everone deals with stress in different ways. But there was a primee that was there before Riley was born and was still there when we left. And I never saw a parent, a grandparent, no one. This poor child jsut layed in bed all day everyday. The nurses would pick him up when they could, but they could not just sit next to him and talk to him, or hold his hand, or tell him that they loved him. I just don't get that. How selfish do you have to be to never visit your sick child? It killed me that days that I could not get into the hospital to see Riley, on those days I would cell the NICU severla times a day to check on her. But not seeing her for month... Can someone explain it to me please?